19 year old boy

I worked extra this week...came in for just a few hours, but ended up staying more. How can you leave with a family distraught and people crying in agony? Their grandson with CP was dying...and they had made him a no code. I couldn't quite understand it all because well...his quality of life wasn't so great...he could barely say ''yes'' or ''no'' at full capacity and was so dependant upon his family, but they loved him so much. His Grandfather was literally loosing it. How could I help? What could I do. The tears and boxes and boxes of tissues. The pastor came, but I guess the Grandfather isn't a Christian and it wasn't helping him. So I tried to get someone else to talk to him...a pastor at the hospital because well...they are supposed to be good for all religons and I had to tell him not to speak of Christianty to the Grandfather...what? I guess it was my choice. It just seems wrong...so confussing...maybe this was the Grandfather's chance to accept Jesus...but I didn't want him to be forced into it and he needed support. Was this playing God? So confussing. That was last night. I wonder how the boy is doing. He was so young. Wonder if he is still hanging on. So much love there was for him. I don't understand. And there I was...feeling numb and well...half way immune to their cries. But at the same time my heart went out to the living...I wanted to do all I could to help them...help ease their pain. That's why I stayed longer...how can you just leave like that? You can't!